Joe Buck and his wonderful day in upstate New York with Alcides Escobar

The Jays are out. It was a heartbreaking defeat. They were beat by the better team. Unfortunately in playoff baseball you can’t live and die by the long ball. And that’s exactly what they tried to do. Situational hitting is a must at this level. Jose Bautista tried to will the team to victory with home run after home run in big spots. This team would be long gone if it wasn’t for his efforts.

Top 3 things Fox announcers are doing after the Royals put out the Jays.

1. Joe Buck is going for a nice evening with Alcides Escobar in the wine region of New York. They will reminisce on his brilliant over-reactions to seeing-eye singles while riding side by side on horseback. It will just be a superb day.
2. Harold Reynolds will go back to staring at the wall until the next game starts.
3. Fox has announced that each fan in the outfield must grow an Amish beard as a salute to a great American hero.

It’s amusing to look at all the Facebook posts after the election took place. Every PC backer talks about money, and, well, that’s it. Every NDP backer says, well at least it’s not Harper. And the rest of the world is talking about how gorgeous Justin is.

There was never really a time that I enjoyed going to gym class less then when we had to learn how to line dance. There were 2 – 1 hour sessions of my life that I will never get back. And that fact that I know how to line dance a bit is a feeling I will have to live with the rest of my life.

Pizza Pops did quite of damage to me as a child. There was nothing you could do once that pizza goo was in your mouth and it was 300 degrees Celsius. You were done. You tried to create saliva as fast as possible, but you ended up just getting burning hot pizza goo onto your chin. Thinking back now – why didn’t I use a knife and fork?

All the years of golf that I have played, and I have never bagged myself trying to hit a golf ball in between two trees.

I was a goaltender in hockey when I was growing up. That’s all, I thought I would just bring that up. Oh, and I was bagged a lot then.

Why weren’t clear braces made up until a decade ago? It was bad enough that I had to wear pieces of metal in my mouth, but did you have to make it look like my mouth was part of a Terminator movie?

When you looked in somebody’s fridge growing up there was always two jugs of things that looked like orange juice. One was Tang and one was actually orange juice. I never thought to open it up to smell it; so I always just picked the one that had the most unnatural orange colour. I think that I ran a 98% mark of getting Tang. After thinking about this now, that wasn’t all that impressive.

One of these days I would like to complain about the rain; because I just had the car washed.

Kraft Dinner and the reasons Gwyneth Paltrow loves it.

“Am I right, or am I right?” is the worst thing that you have to respond to after something that was offensive was said. Any response that you give is going to be terrible. I usually pretend that I didn’t hear them correctly and say a soft “what?” Then depending on the person they will either repeat the awful thing louder, or they will realize that they are an idiot.

Golf in the early morning is the most difficult time to judge whether its shorts weather or pants weather. These are the things that you have to worry about as a retired man.

Unfortunately we are going to see a crisis in the craft beer market. There are too many breweries being opened up for the amount of population that we have in Southern Ontario. The increase of sales will not continue at quite this pace forever. This could be a tough market in about 5 years.

There is a gentlemen in downtown Kitchener that has a shopping cart. He likes to put cardboard signs with things written on it all around the shopping cart. These things don’t make any sense to me. There is something written about “Dogter MacTavish and Tom Thumb.” Sara and I would like to know what any of these things mean, but it might be a conversation that can never be unheard again.

The Stanley Cup Finals begun last night. Everybody put up their hands that think Jonathan Toews is the best leader in the NHL over the past 25 years.

This past Game of Thrones episode was the epitome of a show flexing its muscles. “Oh, you think I’ve been going along a little too slowly. Take a good look brother. And let the throne run all over you.” My mouth was wide open for nearly the whole hour.

I think I told somebody recently that I missed the show Gossip Girl. Things that should not be repeated by anybody. Unless you are from the upper east side of course.

You have to be an extremely cheap person if you watch a cam version of Mad Max. You are the same person that probably watched the snowed version of The Movie Network on Friday nights at about midnight 20 years ago.

Every time that I see a snow queen type role in any Disney movie; I always think that the role would be perfect for Gwyneth Paltrow. Currently at an 87% clip of seeing her on TV I mutter “she sucks.”

Pasta with red tomato sauce is the beginners cooking recipe. There are people that even screw this up. They might even get the one that has garlic in there if they are feeling adventurous.

Mosh pits are frightening to me. Being pushed around a circle seems to have very little enjoyment. I think I am more in the getting in the middle of a circle and busting out the cookie bake-off type crew.

Once again I witnessed the bat flip from a player when his team was down 6-0 and he made it 6-2. Junior Lake of all guys flipped his bat like he was Albert Pujols. You should get one chance to throw at his crotch with a fastball in his next at bat. He has to stand directly facing the pitcher with his hands behind his head.

Watched a news story about a bus driver that was about to be fired for making a child get off of the bus after causing some problems. Another student had filmed the bus driver forcing the child off of the bus. Parents were calling for his dismissal, furious at him for being so awful. The bus driver had installed a camera at the front of the bus the day before to show the type of abuse that he takes. He took multiple shots off of the side of the head of the kids back pack. After seeing this video the school and parents backed down from their call for firing. The fact that the bus driver had to put a camera up to protect himself from prosecution is pathetic. Another instance of calling for blood before knowing both sides of the story.

There was nothing more frightening for a non-athletic person to monkey hit a ball in front of the class. The boo-birds would come out fast and furious if you missed the tennis ball more than twice in a row. Pressure would mount. The third one better be cranked to the outfield. After 5 terrible at bats you were done.

Kraft Dinner was on sale for $0.65 recently. You have many emotions when you see this price for Kraft Dinner. Fear that you will eat it every day for lunch over the next week. Sadness that you might not buy enough boxes and will have to pay regular price. And then regret after eating it in your boxers on a sunny Wednesday morning.